Monday, February 3, 2014

COMMITMENTPHOBIA

With all the excitement of CNY, forgetting that Valentine's Day lies only around the corner seemed all too easy.



Until of course, someone comes along and starts pouring their heart out to me (somehow lots of people tell me their stories ; apparently I have'good insight' and 'broad perspective' hmm anyway.)

***
My friend told how he has been hopping from girl to girl, date after date. At the same time he told me how he felt these dates were frivolous, empty, somehow lacking in substance. He asked me what was missing and my advice on how he could develop a meaningful relationship.

He theorized that his tendency to flit from one female to another stemmed from fear of commitment. According to him, he is absolutely terrified of being 'tied down' or having to live up to expectations of a relationship. 

After listening, I asked 

Me: "You say you're afraid of commitment. Is it your desire to grow old alone and pass away on your own?"
Him: "Of course not."

Me: "So since you have no wish to be alone, it can only mean you DO desire real and lasting companionship, and for that to come you would first have to commit to someone. Therefore, you are not afraid of commitment. The reason you have not been able to commit, is because you have not yet met the right girl. "

" When the right person appears and you realize that she is 'The One', you would have absolutely no qualms about doing what it takes to have a solid relationship with her. "






                        

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