so my shitty week is still prevailing, and im still majorly fed up at things.
i just hate, HATE it when people make EVERY SINGLE LITTLE THING i do, their business, no matter how insignificant and meaningless it is. one little statement i make, one small thing i do, and they're jumping all over it demanding to know the meaning behind the action, why i did so, why i said so, and furiously dissecting it at a tremendous rate, throwing in all their own assumptions and whatever nonsense, and coming up with all THEIR bullshit theories on every single thing i say or do.
im seriously fed up with this crap. i mean, yes, if it were something which actually held substance, i wouldnt mind you coming and asking me, but some nonchalant statement such as me mentioning what colour i dislike, and theyre all over it. like, jeeeezz! can you just stop following me so closely and breathing down my neck, stop being so high strung and rigid, just cut me some slack and chill?? it's not like there's a major, earth shaking, deep rooted reason for everything i do or say, hello! some things are just casually mentioned and then there's no serious thought that goes into all of my sayings, so STOP IT!!!!
STOP BEING SUCH AN INTERFERING PRYING ANNOYING BUSYBODY!!!!!
there's still a lot more that i have to say, but if i were to pour out everything thats running through my head right now i'd probably end up writing an article the length of a whole harvard student's final semester experiment, so the coupla paragraphs of rants i've put out above will have to suffice.
so now im gonna talk about something else.
i just woke up a few hours ago, from a very interesting dream.
so in my dream i was in a white wedding dress, wearing a veil, all ready to get married. (???)
and for some reason, i had flaming red hair, down to the length of my waist. (????)
yeah the colour of my hair was something like this.
so it must've been like half an hour before the ceremony was about to start, and i was gonna be married to
this guy. yes he's someone real in my life, as in someone i know, but no way im gonna tell you who it is or else all of you would be making assumptions right and left. but i have no idea why it would particularly be him, as he's someone i'd forgotten all about and havent talked to for like what, three years already?
and i remember standing in front of a full length mirror looking at myself, feeling very confused, lost, worried, insecure, etc. the me in the dream was me as i am now, and i was thinking all these thoughts like "im not even 18, how can i be getting married?" "i dont even love this guy, why am i marrying him?"
my bridesmaids were fussing over me, arranging and rearranging the train of my dress, oohing and aahing over the way i looked, but with all the disturbing thoughts bouncing around inside my head, i couldnt take any of that in.
i ripped off the veil, handed it to one of the bridesmaids, shaking my head telling her to tell everyone how i couldnt go through with the wedding, and i then got the hell as fast as i could out of there.